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Home » Elf » S01E01 — Elf

Elf

Season 1, Episode 1 — Elf

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IT'S ALL RIGHT, BUDDY.
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JUST HOW MANY ETCH-A-SKETCHES
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DID YOU GET FINISHED?
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COME ON, BUDDY. HOW MANY?
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I MADE, UH...85.
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EIGHTY-FIVE?
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THAT PUTS YOU...
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915 OFF THE PACE.
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Female elf: OOH--THAT'S BAD.
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WHY DON'T YOU JUST SAY IT?
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I'M THE WORST TOY MAKER IN THE WORLD.
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I'M A COTTON-HEADED NINNY-MUGGINS.
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( gasps )
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NO, BUDDY, YOU'RE NOT A COTTON-HEADED NINNY-MUGGINS.
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WE ALL JUST HAVE DIFFERENT TALENTS, THAT'S ALL.
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SEEMS LIKE EVERYONE ELSE
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HAS THE SAME TALENTS, EXCEPT FOR ME.
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YOU--YOU HAVE, YOU HAVE LOTS OF TALENTS, UH...
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SPECIAL TALENTS IN FACT, LIKE, UM, UH...
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SPECIAL TALENTS?
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YOU CHANGED THE BATTERIES IN THE SMOKE DETECTOR.
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YOU SURE DID--AAA's.
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AND IN SIX MONTHS, YOU'LL HAVE TO CHECK 'EM AGAIN--
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WON'T HE?
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AND YOU'RE THE ONLY BARITONE IN THE ELF CHOIR.
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YOU BRING US DOWN A WHOLE OCTAVE.
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IN A GOOD WAY.
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SEE, BUDDY?
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YOU'RE NOT A COTTON-HEADED NINNY-MUGGINS.
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YOU'RE JUST...SPECIAL.
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AND SO, BUDDY WAS SENT WHERE THE--THE SPECIAL ELVES WORK.
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( devilish laughter ) AAH!
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( Pop Goes the Weasel playing )
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( laughter ) AH!
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( sighs )
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( Pop Goes the Weasel playing )
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( laughter )
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HEY, FOOM FOOM--
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I HATE TO DO THIS TO YOU, BUT YOU THINK YOU COULD
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HELP ME PICK UP THE SLACK ON THOSE ETCH-A-SCKETCHES?
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NO PROBLEM. I APPRECIATE IT.
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BUDDY IS KILLING ME.
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I ALREADY GOT LUM LUM AND CHOO CHOO PULLIN' DOUBLES.
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THAT WAS QUICK THINKING YESTERDAY
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WITH THAT "SPECIAL TALENTS" THING.
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Ming Ming: I FEEL BAD FOR THE GUY.
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I JUST HOPE HE DOESN'T GET WISE.
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WELL, IF HE HASN'T FIGURED OUT HE'S A HUMAN BY NOW,