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Home » Abbott Elementary » S01E07 — Art Teacher

Abbott Elementary

Season 1, Episode 7 — Art Teacher

TMDB episode metadata

Show: Abbott Elementary

Episode title: Art Teacher

Air date: February 08, 2022

Director: Jennifer Celotta

Top billed cast: Quinta Brunson, Tyler James Williams, Sheryl Lee Ralph, Lisa Ann Walter, Chris Perfetti, Janelle James

When the school’s art teacher retires, Janine is thrilled when the replacement ends up being her best friend from college, but things quickly turn sour when Sahar gets in the way of Melissa’s class traditions. Meanwhile, Jacob and Barbara bond over their love for gardening and decide to start a school garden; but when it turns out they don’t know how to successfully grow anything, Gregory secretly gets involved to fix all of their mistakes

Source: TMDB

↓

And that's why Abbott will always stay in my heart.

abbott heart

↓

(chuckles)

chuckles

↓

All right, I'll wrap this up.

↓

You know how I can carry on. Right, Ava?

↓

(laughter)

laughter

↓

I know you can, girl.

girl

↓

Oh. (laughs)

laughs

↓

Barbara, thank you for all your kindness.

barbara

↓

Mel, all that you've done for me.

↓

-I don't know how... -Who is she again?

↓

I do not know that woman's name.

name woman

↓

No, I know this. I know this. It's, uh...

↓

Is she a gym teacher?

teacher

↓

I don't really mess with gym teachers.

teachers

↓

Their voices never match their faces.

faces

↓

♪ Ca-a-a-a-a-thy! ♪

↓

(squeals, chuckles) I cannot believe this is

believe cannot cannot-believe chuckles

↓

your last day with us.

↓

I mean, you have been the greatest

greatest

↓

volunteer art teacher this school has ever seen.

school seen teacher

↓

And look.

↓

Bermuda shorts, because your favorite

favorite

↓

vacation spot is Bermuda!

spot vacation

↓

Well, how sweet.

sweet

↓

-Mm-hmm. -Thank you!

↓

-You're so welcome. -Aww.

welcome

↓

(chuckles)

chuckles

↓

(whispering) Barbara, what is her name again?

barbara name whispering

↓

(Maker's "Hold'em" playing)

holdem holdem-playing makers makers-holdem makers-holdem-playing playing

↓

♪♪

↓

(door opens)

door door-opens opens

↓

(telephone rings)

rings telephone telephone-rings

↓

(door shuts)

door shuts

↓

-Janine. -Yeah?

janine

↓

What's wrong with you?

↓

You psyching yourself up to be yourself today?

today

↓

-(chuckles) -No.

chuckles

↓

Today, my friend Sahar is starting.

friend sahar starting today

↓

So, when I heard we needed a new volunteer art teacher,

heard needed teacher

↓

I called my friend Sahar.

called friend sahar

↓

She's a successful local artist, and she's so cool.

artist cool local successful

↓

Check it out.

check

↓

This is us in college when we first met.

college

↓

(laughs)

laughs

↓

She never got wine stains on her teeth.

↓

Ugh, God. Man, believe it or not,

believe

↓

I had a hard time making friends back then.

friends hard

↓

(chuckling) No.

↓

JANINE: Yeah, yeah, I know.

janine

↓

But Sahar really took me outside of my box, and,

sahar

↓

you know, I'm sure she's gonna do the same thing

↓

for the kids, and I don't know.

kids

↓

-If you think I'm cool... -I don't.

cool

↓

-Janine's cool. -Yes, thank you, Jacob.

cool jacob janine yes

↓

She does puzzles. She knits.

puzzles

↓

Just thank you, thank you.

↓

She wears orthopedics, and she eats plums.

wears

↓

What is wrong with plums?

↓

-I mean... -They're not exactly the coolest fruit.

fruit

↓

-You know what's a cool fruit? -Mm.

cool fruit

↓

-Kiwi. -Exactly.

↓

Mm. Oh.

↓

-Janine! -(gasps)

gasps janine

↓

Oh, my God, Sahar!

sahar

↓

-Mwah, mwah. -Mwah, mwah.

mwah-mwah

↓

Oh, she French?

↓

Good morning, everyone. I'm Sahar.

morning sahar

↓

So, you used to hang out with Janine?

hang janine used

↓

Was it some kind of big sister thing

sister

↓

or some kind of Make-A-Wish for people

wish

↓

who are dying of embarrassment?

↓

(laughs)

laughs

↓

That is Ava. She's funny.

funny

↓

Well, I'm so excited to be here.

excited

↓

I cannot wait to collaborate.

cannot

↓

Okay, let me go show you around. Come on.

↓

Pulling off overalls? That's not easy.

easy

↓

I'm telling you, Twitch is more popular than TV.

telling

↓

More people are actually watching Twitch than...

watching

↓

Jacob, I am trying to oversee nutrition here.

jacob

↓

Oh, yeah, no, of course. Sorry.

course

↓

What about you, Devin? Who's your favorite streamer?

devin favorite

↓

I'm busy, Caillou.

busy

↓

(chuckles) Classic Devin.

chuckles classic devin

↓

I can't believe this is what they're serving the children.

believe children

↓

-Mm-mm-mm. -Mm-mm-mm.

↓

Budget cuts. And it gets worse every year.

budget worse

↓

(exhales sharply)

exhales exhales-sharply sharply

↓

Are there even any vegetables in these meals?

vegetables

↓

Yeah. We got sprouts flown in

↓

from Brussels every morning.

morning

↓

No use getting frustrated with him.

↓

They're just like us -- doing the best with what they got.

best

↓

I saw a NowThis video about some teachers in Kentucky

teachers video

↓

who built a vegetable garden at their school.

built garden school

↓

We could do something like that here, I bet.

↓

-We? -Jacob and Barbara.

barbara jacob

↓

-♪ The ultimate dream team ♪ -(laughs)

dream laughs team

↓

Jacob, stuff like that won't work here.

jacob stuff

↓

But -- But it's worked in other schools.

schools worked

↓

And -- And the great part is it would help the kids,

kids part

↓

but also we'd get to be gardening,

gardening

↓

which is like the best thing ever.

best

↓

Now, that I will agree with.

agree

↓

Oh, my God, are we doing this?

↓

I cannot believe that I'm about ready to say this, but,

believe cannot cannot-believe ready

↓

Jacob, let's do this.

jacob

↓

Ah!

↓

MELISSA: I know they're not assigned.

assigned melissa

↓

We all understand who parks where,

↓

and you parked in my understood spot.

spot

↓

You understand?

↓

Oh, um, she -- she understands.

↓

She got it.

↓

Yeah, I totally -- I -- I'm really sorry.

↓

It won't happen again. I'm just --

happen

↓

I'm still getting used to the way the place works.

place used works

↓

It's all good. That's in the past.

past

↓

Not what I came to talk about anyway.

↓

Well, it's what you started with.

started

↓

I'm joking.

↓

So, what I came to talk about is

↓

this year's Peter Rabbit project, which...

peter peter-rabbit project rabbit years

↓

Oh, oh, oh, it's so great.

↓

You know, every year, both our classes read Peter Rabbit,

classes peter peter-rabbit rabbit read

↓

and then, with the art teacher,

teacher

↓

the kids make their own versions of Peter with paper plates.

kids paper peter

↓

It's the big art project of the second grade.

grade project second second-grade

↓

-It's great. -And this year...

↓

-Mm-hmm? -...there's a surprise.

surprise

↓

(gasps)

gasps

↓

Oh, my goodness.

goodness

↓

Are these new?!

↓

You tell me.

↓

Okay, um...no chocolate stains.

chocolate

↓

No mildew.

↓

Look at this binding tension.

↓

Oh!

↓

How did you get these?

↓

I bought them.

bought

↓

With your own money? No favors?

money

↓

All me.

↓

Oh, yeah, I've been doing this project for 15 years.

project years

↓

It's the first thing I did that the kids really loved.

kids loved

↓

Um...

↓

This one was from my first year.

↓

I-It's Styrofoam.

↓

I get they're bad for the environment,

bad

↓

but you try floating pigs in a blanket

↓

across a hot tub on a paper plate.

paper paper-plate plate

↓

-It's legendary. -Yeah, you're gonna love it.

love

↓

We can talk logistics later.

↓

Awesome! Can't wait!

↓

(squeals) This project is right up your alley.

project

↓

Are we sure Peter Rabbit is the way to go?

peter peter-rabbit rabbit

↓

-Oop? -I just wonder if there's maybe

wonder

↓

a more relevant story?

story

↓

Well, Melissa just got all those new copies.

melissa

↓

S-Sahar?

sahar

↓

I've got it, and I love it.

love

↓

-Oh. -We're gonna elevate the story.

story

↓

Delve deep beneath the surface of Peter Rabbit

deep peter peter-rabbit rabbit

↓

and uncover the metaphors hidden in the story.

story

↓

Oh. Yes. Totally.

yes

↓

Yes. I mean, most people just think of it

yes

↓

as this story about a rabbit who steals carrots.

rabbit story

↓

But we're not like most people. We see subtext.

↓

It's a story about domesticity and capitalism.

story

↓

Exactly. That's what I've always said.

↓

(chuckles) Just wait for me

chuckles

↓

before you talk to Melissa.

melissa

↓

Of course.

course

↓

This is classic Janine and Sahar.

classic janine sahar

↓

I mean, being her friend is so exciting.

exciting friend

↓

We are just doing a ton of cool stuff all the time,

cool stuff

↓

like going to a party at Tierra Whack's house,

house party

↓

which she got to go.

↓

I actually -- I stood outside

↓

and, um, I just listened because I couldn't get in.

↓

It all sounded so fun.

↓

Everyone was having a really good time.

having

↓

(siren wails in distance)

distance

↓

Jacob.

jacob

↓

(laughs)

laughs

↓

Well, would you look at us?

↓

Well, you have fine taste, Mr. Hill.

hill taste

↓

-As do you. -Mm.

↓

You know, the origin of sun hats is an interesting...

interesting

↓

Why don't we just put on some music?

music

↓

-Absolutely. -Mm-hmm.

absolutely

↓

(bossa nova jazz playing)

playing

↓

Is that bossa nova?

↓

Yeah. I-I can change it if you want.

change

↓

No, no.

↓

I love it.

love

↓

-Great. -Okay.

↓

There you are.

↓

-Thank you. -I, uh...

↓

I bought some pre-sprouted plants

bought plants

↓

to expedite the process.

↓

I thought we could have a space for veggies

space

↓

and one for fruits.

↓

Well, you know, I thought it might also be nice

might

↓

if we had a section for flowers, too.

↓

Ah. One step ahead of ya.

ahead step

↓

Lilies!

↓

Like my favorite movie, Lilies of the Field.

favorite favorite-movie field movie

↓

Ah! You know what?

↓

They just don't make men like Sidney Poitier anymore.

anymore

↓

They -- They don't.

↓

They most certainly do not.

certainly

↓

(both laugh)

laugh

↓

Hey, y'all. What's happening here?

yall

↓

Jacob and I are starting a garden

garden jacob starting

↓

to grow some vegetables for the students.

grow students vegetables

↓

Oh, wow. That's really cool.

cool

↓

We got an extra pair of gloves if you want in.

extra pair

↓

No, thanks, I'm good. I mean, I appreciate it, though.

appreciate thanks

↓

Just the opposite of green thumbs over here.

green thumbs

↓

In the '60s, my grandfather started a landscaping business,

business started

↓

Eddie Lawn & Care.

care eddie

↓

Then, in the '90s, my father took it over.

↓

Then, for the first 20 years of my life,

life years

↓

I spent every single summer "vacation"

single spent summer vacation

↓

planting, mowing, and raking.

↓

I cannot stand gardening.

cannot gardening stand

↓

You don't want to over-water that one.

water

↓

From what I've heard.

heard

↓

Amaya, you are in Jupiter's group.

↓

Stop hoarding Saturn's rings.

rings

↓

MELISSA: What do you mean by old? Old how?

melissa

↓

Like I'm old or it's old-fashioned?

↓

-What -- What old? -SAHAR: No, no.

sahar

↓

The project is just a little elementary.

elementary project

↓

Of course it's elementary! This is an elementary school!

course elementary school

↓

Okay, I misspoke. I shouldn't have said "elementary."

elementary

↓

-I'm sorry. -Whoa, whoa, whoa. Whoa.

whoa whoa-whoa whoa-whoa-whoa

↓

-What's going on? -Little miss MoMA over here

miss

↓

thinks a beloved tradition is too "elementary"

elementary thinks tradition

↓

for second graders, so she wants to do

second wants

↓

some installation in the library instead.

installation library

↓

I don't not want to do your project.

project

↓

I just -- You know, Janine and I were talking earlier today.

janine today

↓

Oh, oh, oh, you're in on this, too?

↓

Mm, let's all just take a deep breath

deep

↓

and ask ourselves...

↓

We want to elevate the project.

project

↓

Could you stop saying "we"?

↓

Okay, we're doing the bunny plates

↓

like we've always done,

↓

and that's the end of the discussion.

↓

Janine, get your girl and tell her to watch out,

girl janine watch

↓

because you don't know who you're messing with.

messing

↓

(door opens, slams shut)

door door-opens opens

↓

Okay, so, um, what I got from that

↓

is you should watch out

watch

↓

and you don't know who you're messing with.

messing

↓

-Mm. -Uh...

↓

I am so sorry that got so intense,

↓

but that's why I wanted you to wait

wanted

↓

for me to talk to Melissa with you.

melissa

↓

No apology necessary. At least she's passionate.

↓

True, true.

↓

But still, I'm sorry your art installation project

installation project

↓

got shut down.

↓

Oh, we're gonna do the installation.

installation

↓

Since when have we let one "no" stop us?

↓

A "no" from Melissa

melissa

↓

is like a thousand "no's" from anybody else.

anybody

↓

Melissa's gonna love the installation.

installation love melissa melissas

↓

She just doesn't know it yet

↓

'cause she doesn't think like us.

↓

-We're wired different. -Totally, totally.

↓

I think it's "wired differently," but...

↓

What happened to the Janine who was

happened janine

↓

hopping over turnstiles last year to protest minimum wage

↓

for transit workers?

workers

↓

Actually, I did pay

↓

'cause I couldn't get over the turnstile

↓

and that's how they get paid,

↓

so it wasn't making sense as a protest.

↓

Let me ask you this question.

question

↓

Did you take this job

↓

so that you could be part of the system

part system

↓

or because you wanted to inspire...

wanted

↓

-What's your name? -Bria.

bria name

↓

...students like Bria and her friends

bria friends students

↓

to be the next generation of free thinkers?

free generation

↓

You're good.

↓

You know how to get me fired up. Ha!

fired

↓

But still, we can't use the library

library

↓

without Melissa's co-sign.

melissa melissas sign

↓

I mean, it's her project.

project

↓

What did we do in college when the TAs gave us unfair grades?

college grades

↓

-Cry and accept it? -Flirt with the professor.

↓

No, I-I -- You did that?

↓

All I'm saying is, we just got to go over Melissa's head.

head melissa melissas

↓

JANINE: She is so right.

janine

↓

Sometimes I forget why I got into this job,

forget sometimes

↓

but Sahar reminded me in a way

sahar

↓

where I didn't even know it was happening.

↓

Just like boom!

↓

So cool. (chuckles)

chuckles cool

↓

Actually, you know, it was my grandmother

↓

that fostered my love of gardening.

gardening love

↓

And mischief.

↓

(laughs)

laughs

↓

I'm dead. I am dead.

dead

↓

-(both chuckle) -Barbara. (gasps)

barbara chuckle gasps

↓

-Oh! -Ooh!

↓

Great work, buddy!

buddy

↓

Aww!

↓

Let's get this little guy inside.

↓

(trunk shuts)

shuts

↓

Crap.

↓

GREGORY: Jacob and Barbara have no idea what they're doing.

barbara gregory idea jacob

↓

He was trying to plant a coconut in West Philadelphia

philadelphia west

↓

in soil with a sub-6.3 pH.

↓

Bruh!

↓

Devin, my guy, look at this.

devin

↓

What do you suits want?

↓

What's that for?

↓

Eating. (chuckles)

chuckles eating

↓

It's a zucchini.

zucchini

↓

I know what a zucchini is, man.

zucchini

↓

What do you want me to do with it?

↓

We are growing vegetables for the kids in our new garden.

garden growing kids vegetables

↓

We birthed this.

birthed

↓

Oh, you birthed it?

birthed

↓

Let me -- Can I? Let me see.

↓

Oh, look, you birthed it.

birthed

↓

The baby!

baby

↓

(laughter)

laughter

↓

Look at that baby!

baby

↓

Baby Sidney!

baby

↓

The disrespect!

↓

What am I supposed to do with a twerp squash?

supposed

↓

Feed half a kid? Come on, man.

half

↓

Of course not. That was just a sample of what's to come.

course

↓

Once these plants start blooming,

plants start

↓

we're gonna be swimming in squash.

↓

And then what? We prepare them?

prepare

↓

We do not have time.

↓

We're barely getting by as is.

barely

↓

Y'all can make-believe on your own time.

believe yall

↓

So, not the reaction I was hoping for.

hoping

↓

Devin's right.

↓

-We're being foolish. -Barbara!

barbara

↓

I cannot believe that I let myself get carried away.

believe cannot cannot-believe

↓

Projects like this,

↓

they do not work in public schools.

schools

↓

(gasps)

gasps

↓

I pulled a Janine.

janine pulled

↓

I-I still think there's a way to make...

↓

You -- Mnh-mnh!

↓

-Mnh! -...it work.

↓

There's gotta be a solution here, you know?

solution

↓

(chuckles)

chuckles

↓

Because, you know, if I have to go into that garden

garden

↓

(voice breaking) without my girl Barbara...

barbara breaking girl voice voice-breaking

↓

Sorry. (chuckles sadly)

chuckles

↓

Hey, Ava!

↓

What do you think of these?

↓

Oh, wow, those are fun.

↓

Not you, Carlton. I was asking Sahar.

asking sahar

↓

I agree with Janine. I think they're so fun.

agree janine

↓

You have really good taste.

taste

↓

So, Ava, we have a little favor to ask you.

↓

(keyboard clacking)

↓

She not hear me?

↓

You know, Ava...

↓

When I was doing ayahuasca in Peru,

↓

I was visited by an Earth goddess

earth

↓

who had the exact same energy profile as you.

↓

It was beautiful.

↓

Girl, don't you throw up and poop your pants on that?

girl pants throw

↓

(laughs)

laughs

↓

You're funny. (laughs)

funny laughs

↓

Janine and I were wondering if we could use the library

janine library

↓

for a little installation we're planning.

installation

↓

-Like an art show? -Kind of.

↓

-It's for the kids. -Mm-hmm.

kids

↓

It's sort of an elevated version of Melissa's idea.

idea melissas

↓

Oh, elevated? Hell yeah, you got my okay on that.

↓

-Great. -Darling.

↓

(chuckles) Well, have a great day, Ava.

chuckles

↓

Don't tell me what kind of day to have.

↓

Getting all presumptuous and rude.

↓

Hey, Ava,

↓

I hope today shimmers for you.

hope today

↓

You know what, Sahar? I think it will.

sahar

↓

(Sahar chuckles)

chuckles sahar

↓

Oh, got a little schmutz there.

↓

Oh, a, uh...a kid sneezed on me.

↓

Morning, everyone! Barbara, look.

barbara morning

↓

Zucchini!

zucchini

↓

Washed, grilled, ready to eat.

ready

↓

There's no way all that zucchini came from your garden.

garden zucchini

↓

-I assume. -Assume correctly

↓

you did, Gregory, because I went to the farmers' market.

gregory

↓

I bought a ton of zucchini

bought zucchini

↓

and basically stayed up all night preparing it.

night preparing stayed

↓

Did you guys know you're supposed to dilute

supposed

↓

cold brew concentrate with water?

cold water

↓

I didn't.

↓

Can't really feel my toes.

↓

So, you stayed up all night preparing this?

night preparing stayed

↓

I did. Devin said they didn't have time to do it, so I did it.

devin

↓

Jacob.

jacob

↓

I am really impressed.

↓

Ooh!

↓

You did a real...

real

↓

-Go, Man, Go? -Go, Man, Go!

↓

-(laughs) -Yes!

laughs yes

↓

What the hell is happening?

↓

JACOB: There's more in my car.

jacob

↓

Melissa, I think you're going to love

love melissa

↓

what the kids and I have created.

kids

↓

There better be paper-plate bunnies.

bunnies paper paper-plate paper-plate-bunnies plate plate-bunnies

↓

Oh, there are definitely paper-plate bunnies.

bunnies paper paper-plate paper-plate-bunnies plate plate-bunnies

↓

(whispering) There are paper-plate bunnies, right?

bunnies paper paper-plate paper-plate-bunnies plate plate-bunnies whispering

↓

There are paper-plate bunnies.

bunnies paper paper-plate paper-plate-bunnies plate plate-bunnies

↓

And more than that, there's passion.

↓

Let the experience begin.

begin experience

↓

Yeah, okay.

↓

(gasps)

gasps

↓

Wow!

↓

Guys, this is just great work!

↓

-Oh, my goodness! -Great work!

goodness

↓

Wow, these look so good.

↓

-(laughs) -Oh, my gosh.

gosh laughs

↓

We all worked very hard on our bunnies,

bunnies hard worked

↓

so we thought it was only right to give them a home.

home

↓

-Oh, my gosh. -Oh, wow.

gosh

↓

Sahar!

sahar

↓

I don't usually explain my art to other people,

explain usually

↓

and I'm sure you already totally get it.

↓

Yeah, no, couldn't be clearer.

↓

Sahar, I got to hand it to you, this is wonderful.

hand sahar

↓

SAHAR: My thesis was to break societal norms

break sahar

↓

by creating and destroying all at once,

↓

using what held us back to propel us forward.

forward using

↓

Yeah, I mean, that's how you got to do it.

↓

(chuckles)

chuckles

↓

-Sahar. -Mm-hmm?

sahar

↓

What is this garden made of?

garden

↓

Oh, that's the best part.

best part

↓

It's made out of the Peter Rabbit books.

books peter peter-rabbit rabbit

↓

Niecy.

↓

-Yeah, it'll work. -For what?

itll

↓

To brutally bludgeon your friend.

friend

↓

Why are you reacting this way?

↓

The project was gorgeous.

project

↓

Sahar, you ruined the books she bought.

books bought ruined sahar

↓

-Mm-hmm. -You all don't understand.

↓

The whole project was about pushing boundaries.

project whole

↓

How about I push the boundaries of your head with this book?!

book head push

↓

No!

↓

All right.

↓

(exhales sharply)

exhales exhales-sharply sharply

↓

Sahar, this project was about

project sahar

↓

the kids practicing their fine motor skills

kids practicing skills

↓

in a creative way.

creative

↓

You took this way too far.

↓

SAHAR: There's no such thing.

sahar

↓

And we can just get more books. It's not hard.

books hard

↓

It is hard, actually.

hard

↓

Then I'll use some of my money to create a personal grant

create money personal

↓

so that the school can get more relevant books

books school

↓

than Peter Rabbit.

peter peter-rabbit rabbit

↓

What is your problem with Peter Rabbit?

peter peter-rabbit problem rabbit

↓

It's just been done.

↓

It's done for a reason.

reason

↓

Are there even any bunnies of color in it?

bunnies

↓

The kids like it, okay?

kids

↓

Just because a bunch of people like something

bunch

↓

doesn't make it bad.

bad

↓

Eh.

↓

Sahar, we owe Melissa an apology.

melissa sahar

↓

Wow. I knew it.

↓

-I knew you were one of them. -One of who?

↓

A conductor of mediocrity and conformity.

↓

You know, I thought it was so cool

cool

↓

that you worked in an underprivileged school,

school worked

↓

but now I see that you don't even care

care

↓

about inspiring the kids.

kids

↓

You know what? I hate to say it,

hate

↓

but I think you're a conventional thinker.

↓

You know what?

↓

You can get out.

↓

(chuckles) Actually, Janine,

chuckles janine

↓

I'm gonna go.

↓

And, by the way, I lied.

lied

↓

You are swimming in that sweater.

sweater

↓

Yeah, well,

↓

your real name is Sarah!

name real

↓

I saw it in your birth certificate collage!

birth

↓

Just don't.

↓

Did the art show start?

start

↓

Did I miss the step and repeat?

miss repeat step

↓

Melissa, I had no idea she was gonna do that.

idea melissa

↓

I am so s--

↓

No, don't you dare apologize. I'm proud of you.

apologize dare proud

↓

You did the right thing kicking that wannabe Zoe Kravitz

↓

-out of here. -You kicked Sahar out?!

kicked sahar

↓

Aw, man, Janine! What's her handle?

handle janine

↓

I have no idea why you were friends with her to begin with.

begin friends idea

↓

Look, I mean,

↓

without Sahar, college wouldn't have been fun for me.

college sahar

↓

She made me feel like

↓

I fit in somewhere being myself.

↓

She made being an outcast cool.

cool

↓

Being a real person is more important than being cool.

cool person real

↓

And you're a real person.

person real

↓

Who owes me 75 copies of Peter Rabbit before next year.

peter peter-rabbit rabbit

↓

Okay, if you guys are finished with this very special episode,

episode special

↓

Janine, can you shoot me Sahar's number?

janine number shoot

↓

I'm tryin' to go out this weekend.

tryin weekend

↓

Just what I need -- a man who wears used pants

pants used wears

↓

bringing me a tray of pickles.

bringing

↓

Devin, Jacob stayed up all night long

devin jacob night stayed

↓

preparing this zucchini for the children's lunches.

preparing zucchini

↓

We realize how difficult

↓

-your day must be. -Mm.

must

↓

You work under stressful conditions,

↓

and you still provide for hundreds of kids a day.

hundreds kids

↓

And I am sorry for insulting your food.

food

↓

I am sure it's...great.

↓

I appreciate that. And it is great.

appreciate

↓

-You should try some. -Oh, I have.

↓

No, not with this new microwave we got.

↓

These things is piping hot.

↓

Go ahead. Give it a try.

ahead

↓

Yeah.

↓

(Barbara chuckles nervously)

barbara chuckles

↓

Yeah? Yeah?

↓

Mmm. Tater tots.

↓

Oh, that's a chicken nugget.

chicken

↓

Ooh.

↓

Anyways, here it is, all ready to serve.

ready

↓

Oh, yep.

↓

-(grunts) -Ooh.

↓

DEVIN: That's a health-code violation.

code devin

↓

I can't be serving food y'all made at home.

food home yall

↓

Go ahead, get some more nuggets.

ahead

↓

How'd you get those?

howd

↓

I think the what is more important than the how here.

↓

I obviously could not afford to buy the books myself,

books obviously

↓

so I had to get creative.

creative

↓

So, what you see here is a commentary

↓

on both domesticity and capitalism.

↓

Uh, as well as socialism and sexism.

↓

If you think about it for a second,

second

↓

carrot.

↓

Or not.

↓

It's up to the eye of the beholder

↓

of the person who has the eye.

person

↓

JANINE: I reached out to some art collectors

janine

↓

who notoriously have money to burn.

money

↓

I sold the art installation

installation

↓

and had enough money to replace the books.

books money

↓

Pretty cool.

cool

↓

Oh, why would you put that together?

↓

Power clashing.

power

↓

Okay.

↓

Okay, you are gonna flip when you see. Go.

↓

Ohh.

↓

It's breathtaking!

↓

It's like our own little Pandora.

↓

You know how like in Avatar when...

↓

No.

↓

It's okay. I guess we don't have to like

↓

all the same things all the time.

↓

(tool clatters)

clatters

↓

(school bell rings)

bell bell-rings rings school school-bell school-bell-rings

↓

-Oh. -Oh. Uh, let's go.

↓

Yes!

yes

↓

(sighs)

sighs

↓

(door shuts)

door shuts

↓

GREGORY: Oh, they were absolutely killing everything.

absolutely gregory

↓

I don't think a single seed would have survived.

single

↓

I couldn't just sit there and watch that.

watch

↓

It's like my dad always said.

↓

"A real man doesn't ignore the root of the problem.

ignore problem real

↓

Now pick that hoe up!"

pick

↓

I hate gardening so much.

gardening hate

↓

-- Captioned by VITAC --

captioned vitac