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Home » Idiocracy » S01E01 — Idiocracy

Idiocracy

Season 1, Episode 1 — Idiocracy

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- No! Stop! Calm down! - Calm down! Calm down!
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- How'd this happen? - How did it happen?
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- [ Alarm Continues ] - Your floor is now clean.
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Your floor is now clean.
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[ Narrator ] Joe had awakened to a world in crisis.
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The economy was in a state of deep neglect.
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A great dust bowl had ravaged food supplies.
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And the number one movie in the country was called Ass.
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[ All Laughing ]
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And that's all it was for 90 minutes.
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[ Movie: Farting ]
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It won eight Oscars that year, including best screenplay.
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[ Electronic Voice ] Enjoy your Extra Big-Ass Fries.
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You didn't gimme no fries. I got an empty box.
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Would you like another Extra Big-Ass Fries?
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I said I didn't get any.
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[ Electronic Voice ] Thank you. Your account has been charged.
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Your balance is zero.
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What? Oh, no. No! Please come back when you can afford to make a purchase.
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[ Beeping ] I'm sorry you're having trouble.
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Come on! My kids are starvin'. I'm sorry you're having trouble.
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[ Buzzes ]
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This should help you calm down.
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Please come back when you can afford to make a purchase.
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Your kids are starving. Carl's Jr. believes no child should go hungry.
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You are an unfit mother. Your children will be placed in the custody of Carl's Jr.
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Carl's Jr. "Fuck you. I'm eating."
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Welcome to Carl's Jr.
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Would you like to try our Extra Big-Ass Taco,
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now with more molecules?
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Hey! Is this particular individual the unfit mother?
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- Me? No. - Okay. This particular individual is unscannable.
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Listen, I can explain, okay? I was in an army experiment.
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Wait a second. There's the other pod from the army experiment.
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There was a girl. She was from the same experiment.
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- Yeah, that's enough of your bullshit, sir. - [ Groaning ]
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[ Narrator ] Joe was arrested for not paying his hospital bill...
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and not having his U.P.C. tattoo.
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He would soon discover that in the future, justice was not only blind...
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but had become rather retarded as well.
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You shut up! Now-- [ Clears Throat ]
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I'm fixin' to commensurate this trial here.
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We gonna see if we can't come up with a verdict up in here.
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Now, since y'all say you ain't got no money,
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we have "proprietarily" obtained for you...
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one of them court-appointed lawyers.
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So, put your hands together and give it up for Frito Pendejo.
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You're my lawyer?