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It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia

Season 1, Episode 1 — The Gang Gets Racist

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Well you... Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
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- What are you doing, dude? - What?
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That girl's gorgeous.
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She's the perfect opportunity to prove that we're not racist.
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- She probably has friends for me. - Well, come on,
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f anything, I think we should be focused on black men, first of all.
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What?
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We don't really need... We need black guys, so.
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Black guys? What the hell are you talking about?
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You know.
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Is this about that waitress at the coffee shop, dude?
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Oh, my God! Dude, you are obsessed with this chick.
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No, I'm not.
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- Let me see your wallet. - Why?
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Are you still carrying a picture of her in your wallet?
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No.
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- Give it to me. Give it. - Oh, my God! Stop making a scene!
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Just give me the wallet! Give me the wallet!
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I can't get the goddamn...
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It's okay! It's okay, everybody!
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- You're making a scene. - You're making a scene!
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I got it. Okay, okay, okay, okay. Hold on a second.
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- Ha! Ha-ha! Ha! - Give it to me!
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- He had it! - Okay! You found it!
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You know what I'm gonna do, I'm gonna tear it up!
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No, don't!
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Fine, just give me it. I'll call her. I'll call the black girl, okay?
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Okay, buddy. We're cool. We're cool.
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We're good. Thanks, guys. See ya.
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I had the craziest dream last night that I was in Cleveland, Ohio,
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which is really weird, because I've never even been to Ohio.
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This guy was wearing a bunny suit,
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and he was coming out... - You know what, Dee?
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I don't wanna hear about your dreams. Okay?
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I hate listening to people's dreams.
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It's like flipping through a stack of photographs.
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If I'm not in any of 'em and nobody's having sex,
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I just... I don't care.
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Oh. I'm sorry. I would listen to your dreams.
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- You're my brother and I love you. - I'm sorry. I am.
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- Hey! What's goin' on, guys? DENNIS: Terrell.
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- How are you? - Hey! What's up? What's up?
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How you doin'? Dennis! What's goin' on?
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- All right, man. - How's it goin', man?
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Good, man.
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Listen, um, you mind stepping outside with me for a second, man?
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- Yeah, I'll come outside. - Yeah?
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- Yeah. Okay. - All right, man, come on.