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Home » It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia » S01E01 — The Gang Gets Racist

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia

Season 1, Episode 1 — The Gang Gets Racist

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We should totally embrace the situation!
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- We're a gay bar from now on. - Absolutely, man!
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No goddamn way. Have you guys seen this?
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"Looking for that new hot spot to spot that stud?
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"Well, Paddy's Irish Pub has plugged that hole."
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- That's a nice notice. - No, it's not a nice notice.
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I don't want to be plugging anybody's holes.
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- I'm gonna have to agree with Mac. - Of course you are.
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I made $300 last night. How much did you make?
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First of all, that's rude.
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And that has nothing to do with what I'm talking about.
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- It has everything to do with it. - It is what you're talking...
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Listen, I don't think we have much of a choice. We need to do this.
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If you guys remember, one of the major reasons
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we got this bar in the first place was to get laid.
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Maybe you did it to get laid.
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I got a little something I like to call "business ethics".
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Business ethics? Charlie, the only reason you don't care
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s because you have black girls hanging all over you for no reason.
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Okay, you know what? Chill out. You're gonna screw it up.
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Screw it up? I happen to have a date with a nice young lady today.
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Ouch. Look, you guys, it's a purely fiscal decision.
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Bullshit. You don't care about the money. You just like the attention.
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What the hell is that supposed to mean?
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"Everybody look at me!" You know exactly what I mean, pretty boy.
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- Hey, handsome. - Hey, beautiful.
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- Hey, sexy. - Hey, hoss.
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I just get along really well with those guys.
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- They're vibing. - No, you're leading them on.
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- You're not gay, you're just vain. - Okay, time out.
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Here's what we should do. Let's take a vote. All right?
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DEE: Fine. MAC: Okay.
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All those in favor of Paddy's Pub remaining a gay bar, say "aye".
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- Aye. - Aye. Opposed?
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Keeping in mind that you don't get a vote.
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DEE: Why? - Because you're the bartender.
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- You're not one of the owners. - No, Sweet Dee gets a vote.
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- No, she doesn't! - Of course I get a vote!
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(arguing indistinctly)
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All owners opposed, say "nay".
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All owners, people who own the bar who are opposed, say "nay".
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All people who own the bar who are opposed say "nay".
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- Nay. - Two against one! Oh, well.
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Paddy's Irish Pub will henceforth remain the hottest gay bar
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n Philadelphia.
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Hey, hey! What's going on?
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- Look at you! You look good! - Oh, thank you. That's so sweet.
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- So, where we going? - I thought we'd go grab a drink.